I was reading an article in Oprah magazine recently about a mid-wife crisis. And before you ask, not the kind of mid-wifery that involves afterbirth.
It's that period in your married life where you are past the newlywed stage, well into family, home and career and you wake up to find this really annoying ass of a man in bed next to you. And you might think, "Huh, I could go back to being single again."
For the longest time, I thought maybe I wasn't one of those people cut out for life in suburbia. I never really wanted kids. The ball of fire was an act of God ... and a slight miscalculation on the particular day of the month. I'm never going to drive a minivan or join the local Mothers of Preschoolers group. I will go to very loud rock concerts until they won't let me in with my walker. I teach my kid the proper names of his body parts. I believe in free speech, a woman's right to govern her own body and the right to love and marry whom you choose. How did I end up in the 'burbs?
It was a pleasant surprise to read this article. I'm not the only 30-something woman who wakes up to life, unsure of how I got here. Actually, I've never gotten past that intial thought about being single. I honestly cannot imagine a life when the hubby is not in it. Who would snuggle me at night? That is important!
But it is refreshing to know that I'm not the only woman who might struggle from time to time with the strictures of middle class in the Midwest.
The key is having good hobbies -- and good porn. Definently good porn.
3 comments:
I have been struggling with this feeling a lot sooner that I would have ever expected. Hubby and I are still newly weds, not even past the 2 year mark. Moving to Utah and becoming a stay at home Mom all at once has thrown me into a solitude I have never felt before. I haven't read the article, but have done my own reading about this feeling and it does make me feel a little better knowing I am not alone. I don't feel as guilty for dreaming of my previous life with no hubby and no baby and plenty of time for me.
Nevertheless, I would not give up hubby or baby for anything in the world. They are my happiness.
'and don't forget good girlfriends!
Girl, you are definitely not alone!! If you recall, I have talked to you several times about this issue. Married life in general is hard, but when you look back on your life and where it is today, compared to what you think it could have been are 2 way different things.
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