Seeking disappointment

There is nothing I like more than finding humor in unexpected places.

This weekend I was scanning Craig's List for a bed to go in our soon-to-be redecorated spare bedroom. It has served as office/hubby's dumping ground for years, and I am reclaiming it to serve as a beautiful little room that no one will sleep in. But it will be so pretty.

After scanning the crap people want to sell for a half hour or so, I flipped over to the personals. I skim these for two reasons, 1) It's interesting to see what people look for in a mate, and b) It reminds me to be thankful that I no longer have to date, because, DAMN it is lonely out there.

This time, one caught my eye, "Looking for my future second ex-wife.." Oh yeah, that has to be good.

I was rewarded well for my interest. This post was sarcastic, caustic and downright hilarious. Although this guy hits on some of the most stereotypical aspects of marriage, he does it with a high-brow snobbery that makes my writer's heart happy.

It's obvious I need to lock myself into another long term pseudo-religious contract that will ensure bitterness and hatred.

I'm hoping for sex to become a chore or a sleep aid, and basic hygiene and grooming to take a backseat to syndicated television. And what about the years of passive-aggressive bickering and codependent nonsense?

Seriously, how could you not love this guy?