Theory proven

I love it when I'm right.

I have always had this theory that some people are emotional vampires. My former friend Betty is the perfect example. I consider myself a pretty embulient person. I like to laugh and joke and generally act inappropriate for my age. But every time Betty was around, I felt myself sucked down into her malaise. She wasn't depressed, she just bitched about everything, and eventually, I would join into her gripe. She could suck the good mood out of a room with one quick story of the time she was molested by her grandmother. Yeah, that's fun party conversation.

After I was married, I slowly started seperating myself from her. She was also married and complained about her husband all the time. Then I would complain about mine, and then I'd actually feel bad because he is a good guy. But when she wanted to have children, then I really couldn't take it. She had trouble concieving and at one point told me that she would kill me if I became pregnant before her. Really? Take my life? Ok, time for the big fuck off. I couldn't stay around a watch her do that to an innocent child.

Today I read an article in O Magazine about spongy people. I am a spongy person. Suddenly I feel like Elaine from Seinfeld.. and yes, my hubby is sponge-worthy.

But that's beside the point. In this article, Martha Beck described how some people absorb the negative energy that others put off and let it ruin positive energy. I actually firgured this out from my experience with Betty. I should never spend time with the complainer at work -- and you know exactly who that is. I should never spend time with the girl who can't find a good man, or the wife who hates her husband. I absorb their negativity and project onto my life. I just assumed I was naturally sensative, maybe a bit psychic and obviously destined to find great fame and fortune with my gifts. I guess that's out. But I'm glad that someone else validated my theory.

If you're a bit spongy, vulnerable to the unsettling energy of others, count yourself lucky. You've been given an incentive to armor up, to consciously screen out the ubiquitous stresses that afflict humanity. Create your shining suit, keep your checklist on hand, and head out into battle, knowing that the power to keep yourself safe from social contagion is one thing you'll always find within.